“No,” I snapped, grabbing Dante’s hand and stalking back toward the Mustang.
Beck was limping in our direction, his face drawn, but I breezed past him like he didn’t even exist.
“So much for a fun night out,” I snapped when Dante joined me in the car and I revved the engine. I could see that the other racers who’d just finished looked confused that I was leaving, but fuck them. I had zero desires to hang around those lying, traitorous bastards a second longer.
We drove in silence for a long time before Dante shifted in his seat to stare at me.
“What pissed you off more?” he asked. “The fact that they played you? Or that you fell in love with that asshole?”
My jaw dropped, and I shot Dante a glare. “I did not fall in love with him,” I spluttered my denial, but my cheeks heated and my stomach churned.
“Uh huh,” Dante murmured, then cranked the stereo and wound down his window. Apparently that’s all the conversation he was in the mood for.
Fucking fine by me. The last thing I wanted to do, was examine whether I was more pissed off at Beck for forcing me to kill a man, or the fact that he made me ... care.
5
Dante dropped me off at Jefferson the next morning, and I waited until the very last minute to get out at Ducis Academy. A uniform, makeup and hair shit, had been delivered to Dante’s last night, so I was dressed the part. Even if I was all broken inside.
“See you later, Riles,” he called through the window. “Call me if you need anything.”
I nodded and blew him a kiss. “I will. Drive carefully back to Jersey.”
He had shit to do this week and couldn’t hang around to babysit me. Which was fine. I was planning on keeping my head down, ignoring Delta, and moving into my new apartment. One promise Catherine was going to keep.
“Go away,” I growled as Evan fell into step beside me on my way to class.
“Would if I could,” he muttered on a sigh, but it was his irritated tone that had me pausing in the empty hallway and scowling at him.
“What the fuck does that mean?” I demanded. “I didn’t ask you to stalk me, so just go away.”
Evan rolled his eyes, scrubbing a hand through his brown and blond streaked hair. “Cut the shit, Riles. It’s Beck you’re pissed at so quit taking it out on the rest of us.”
Outrage choked me for a moment, and I stared at him like he’d just grown three heads. “Ex-cuse me? I’m not pissed at you? Oh, I guess I just imagined that happy family bullshit at breakfast just hours before masked goons kidnapped me naked and then I got forced to shoot someone.” I was trying really fucking hard to keep my voice down, but hot pulses of anger had me on the edge of losing control.
Evan darted his gaze around to make sure no one was listening before glaring at me. “You know it’s not safe to talk about that shit here, Riley.” His voice was pitched low and full of ... what? Regret? Doubtful. “But it’s not an option to leave you alone. Things ... shit has happened while you’ve been gone and it’s important that people know you’re still one of us.”
I scoffed a humorless laugh. “I’ve fallen for this cloak and dagger bullshit one too many times, Evan. Why should I believe a damn word out of your mouth?”
He didn’t reply, his jaw tight and his fists curled by his side as he looked down the hallway, like he was waiting for...
“Of course,” I sneered. “You were nothing but a glorified stalling tactic.”
Beck stormed toward us with long strides, and I shook my head. I couldn’t face him again so soon. Not after how rattled he’d left me after the race. Despite my tough bitch act, and my strong words to Dante, when we’d gotten home I’d spent the whole night crying. It was only through the grace of makeup that the evidence didn’t show today in my puffy eyes.
“I’m late,” I muttered, hurrying toward my class and slipping inside mere moments before Beck reached us.
I was totally unsurprised to see Evan stroll casually into the class about five minutes later, despite the fact that he was a fucking senior in the university part of Ducis. Apparently the teachers didn’t see an issue with it either as Mr. Greensmith barely batted an eyelid at Evan’s presence. Money talks, I guess.
Since the incident where I was forced to kill a man, the real world had faded away, and I’d been living in a weird suspended reality. So it was no surprise that I’d completely forgotten my class was calculus. And being in calculus meant…
“Riley!” Eddy’s familiar voice hurt almost as much as Beck’s.
I slowly lifted my eyes and met her wide, worried ones. “Yes,” I said without inflection.
She blinked at me, and my chest ached at the wounded expression on her face.
“I’ve been so worried about you,” she said softly. “Jasper wouldn’t tell me anything, you weren’t answering your phone, and you haven’t been in school for over a week.”
I shot Evan the quickest side eye ever, and he gave a brief shake of his head.
She doesn’t know.
The worst fucking shit of my life had happened in the past week, and my best friend didn’t know. Of course she didn’t. This was all about the fucking heirs of Delta. But … she was still part of them, of this world that I was determined to cut out of my life as much as possible.
She took a shaky step closer. “Did I do something?”
My eyes burned as I lurched to my feet. Pushing past her, I sprinted from the room, slamming open the door of the nearest bathroom and hauling ass inside.
My breathing was so fast that I felt light headed, and I wondered if maybe I was hyperventilating or something, because I couldn’t seem to catch my breath. Bracing myself against the sinks, I stared at my reflection. Despite my skill with makeup, I’d barely managed to hide the dark circles under my eyes. Even if I hadn’t had Beck angst keeping me awake, nightmares were a constant lately. I’d been having them ever since I found myself in this world, only now I could add a gunshot and blood spatter across walls to the fucked up visions.
The door opened again, and I knew it was Eddy without even turning my head.
“Girl, seriously. We are not leaving this fucking room until you talk to me.”
Straightening, I turned to her, relieved that my breathing had returned to normal. The tightness in my chest remained though. “There’s nothing to talk about. I can’t trust anyone involved with Delta.”
Eddy’s face fell. “I don’t understand. You were fitting in really well, all of the guys consider you one of them. The first chick, at least since they were adults, that they’ve ever truly cared about. What happened to screw it all up?”
They fucking happened!
I wanted to scream, at the top of my lungs. “They betrayed me,” I said. “I trusted them, and they let me walk right into a fucked up situation.”
Eddy threw her hands up, exasperation creasing her face. “You know that Delta controls them. They have to play the game, otherwise shit gets really messed up. You have to ignore the bad stuff and remember the times that were real … remember how they made you feel when everything was on the line.”
Anger washed away my sadness. “If I hear the word game one more goddamn time, I’m gonna lose my mind.”