“Really?” That shocked Kenneth. He expected Nic would be fighting men off all hours of the day. “How old are you? Surely, you’ve had at least one serious relationship.”
A sexy chuckle slipped from Nic’s lips. He popped the lid on his food and sniffed. “I’m thirty-six. Damn. A queso-covered burrito. It’s like you’re a mind reader.”
“Ah. The subject change. You’ve had an ugly relationship.”
Nic snorted. “Hasn’t everyone?”
Kenneth didn’t know how to respond, because no. He hadn’t. Not really, but then it looked that way right now in his very fake life. But the man Kenneth had been before becoming Kenneth hadn’t had time for that bullshit. He had been trying to survive. His life had been secretive. Dangerous. Still was, if he was honest with himself.
“I’ll let you keep your secrets.” Maybe Nic would let him keep his too.
Kenneth popped the lid on his dish and splashed some hot sauce on top. He focused on eating so Nic could too. Three bites in, Nic finally broke the silence. “He was five years younger than me and completely unfettered by reality.”
Unfettered by reality. Kenneth liked that. “How so?”
Nic kept his gaze locked on his food. “He was young and pretty. Life was always easy for him. People always just gave him whatever he wanted if he smiled enough. He didn’t understand why I had to work. Why did I have to travel? Couldn’t someone else at another department do that? He liked telling people his boyfriend was an FBI agent, but he didn’t want me to actually work the job. I tried really hard to balance things, but it was never enough.”
“What was his name?”
“Chaos.”
Kenneth stopped eating. “Are you being serious?”
Nic snorted out a laugh. “Yes.”
Laughter burst from Kenneth without his permission. “Yeah. No one named Chaos has ever worked for anything.”
They exchanged a glance and burst into laughter.
Nic swiped at his eyes. “You know, I didn’t expect to like you.”
“I didn’t expect to like you either.”
They both visibly fought not to exchange another glance. Kenneth took a drink. Their eyes met. Kenneth had to cover his mouth to keep from spewing orange soda all over their food. It was nice. He hadn’t felt so free in ages. Kenneth wanted more.
Hot water poured down Nic’s body. He tried not to think about his night, but it was all he thought about. They had talked for hours. Nic had forgotten he had to work tomorrow. He had forgotten everything. Kenneth wasn’t at all what Nic expected. He was down to earth and nice. The guy was fucking insightful as hell and funny. God, he was so funny. Halfway through the night, Nic found himself incapable of looking at anything other than Kenneth’s lips and eyes. A craving had built to an insane level. Then the night had ended, and Kenneth hadn’t as much as hugged him. They had shaken hands, for fuck’s sake. Like business associates. Goddamn. That ate at Nic. He should let this go.
Nic stepped from the shower and dried his skin. He tried extra hard to keep his mind blank. Nic grabbed his underwear and pulled it on, determined to go to bed with an empty brain. He gathered his dirty clothes from the floor. As he lifted his pants, a piece of paper fell from his back pocket. Confusion had him setting the clothes aside and unfolding the note. He hadn’t even noticed anything in his pockets and Nic definitely hadn’t put it there.
His gaze slid across the paper. A smile stretched his lips.
I think you’re incredibly sexy, but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. You can see me again as friends, and that’ll be fine. I’m good with being a friend. I need that too. But if you’re interested in more, I have to head to Massachusetts this weekend. You should come with me.
—Ken
Nic bit his bottom lip. Kenneth was smooth as fuck. They had been together all night, and he hadn’t seen Kenneth write any note. He definitely hadn’t felt that note being slipped into his back pocket.
Aimlessly, Nic padded from the bathroom while still staring at the scrawled words. He moved to the desk in his bedroom and sat. Nic leaned back in his chair and focused on his black computer screen while seeing nothing. With his mind on lockdown, he woke his computer and opened the file he had been secretly building on Kenneth. He pulled up his latest surveillance video. Kenneth sat alone at an outdoor cafe. Too many times, the video zoomed in on Kenneth’s face. Nic had the same thoughts now as he’d had then. Kenneth looked unhappy.
At the time of taking the video, Nic hadn’t cared. He assumed the guy’s wife made him miserable after the disappearing and cheating scandal. Now he knew the stories of Kenneth hiding and suffocating. Nic paused the recording on Kenneth’s face. Sometimes, he felt suffocated too. He had been climbing in his career, neglecting his personal life to do so, only to have this one case become such a deep obsession that it stole his future from him. Now he wondered if his passion to solve this case hadn’t actually been infatuation with the man at the center of it all. While he didn’t think that was true, he still questioned himself.
There was no denying those full, gorgeous lips wiped his mind. Those light-colored eyes seemed to see all the way to the depths of Nic’s soul. There was something happening between them. Unfortunately, there was a very good possibility it might destroy his career. He couldn’t give a valid reason for that deep-seated belief, but it was there. Nic’s mind stuck on repeat as the image of Kenneth’s heated stare infiltrated his brain and set up shop. At one point, Kenneth had sipped his drink and then licked his lips. Nic had gone hard, then fought to hide it. He didn’t recall the cold senator being this fucking sexual. Now that Nic had noticed, he couldn’t stop. The way Kenneth stared at Nic was addicting. He wanted more. Nic craved it.
His hand slid south as he stared at Kenneth’s image. He needed to know what those lips felt like wrapped around his cock. Nic set his erection free and stroked. Kenneth had been hiding his sexuality for decades. Would that repression make him wild on Nic’s dick?
“Fuck.”
He wanted to know. Nic stroked faster. He gripped the edge of the desk and gasped for air. Pressure climbed his shaft. Nic held his breath. His gaze never wavered from Kenneth’s face. Nic’s obsession had him closer to the edge, faster than ever before. He longed to paint Kenneth’s full lips with his cum. When the orgasm hit, Nic cried Kenneth’s name. Even as he stroked out the last drops of cum, no regret hit. That was answer enough for him. He would go to Massachusetts with Kenneth. One weekend. He had to know. Nic had to have him.
Chapter Four
A quick private flight had taken them to Massachusetts, where Kenneth had arranged for a car before their arrival. He swore he felt Nic’s nervousness every mile of their trip. Kenneth didn’t know how to set him at ease.
“It’s really beautiful here. I can’t stop staring at all these trees.”
Kenneth nodded but kept his eyes locked on the road. “It’s peaceful. I started coming here a few years ago to wind down on long weekends and whatnot. It’s a great place to get lost.”
“Is that what we’re doing this weekend?”