“No,” Baker said.
She scrunched her nose. “No? No what?”
“Don’t denigrate yourself. You’re perfect exactly how you are.”
Jodelle chuckled, but it wasn’t exactly a humorous sound. “Baker, I’m forty-eight. At this point in my life, I know what I am and what I’m not, and what I’m not is perfect. I’m about twenty…okay, probably more like thirty pounds heavier than I should be. When you’re barely an inch over five feet, those extra pounds really show. And living here in Hawaii, seeing all the beautiful women in their bikinis, just hammers that home all the more.”
“I’ve never understood the desire for women to be skin and bones,” Baker said. His eyes strayed, raking down her length, stopping on her tits for a moment before scanning the rest of her body. She had on a pair of shorts, and it took everything in him not to reach out and caress the tanned skin of her thigh. “Trust me when I say, I love how you look. You okay with ground buffalo in the spaghetti sauce?”
She stared up at him for a beat. Baker could see her pulse hammering in her neck. But eventually she took a deep breath. “I haven’t ever had ground buffalo. What’s it taste like?”
“Beef,” Baker said, slowly standing up. There was nothing he wanted more than to lean down and kiss her, but it was too soon for that.
“Then why not just get ground beef?” Jodelle asked with an adorable tilt of her head.
“Because buffalo’s leaner,” he told her, forcing himself to head back into the kitchen.
“And why not get lean beef?” she asked.
Baker’s lips twitched. He couldn’t help it. Never in a million years would he have thought he’d be standing in his kitchen having a discussion about the merits of buffalo meat over beef. “It’s got selenium, an antioxidant that helps prevent oxidative stress and reduces the inflammation that a poor diet causes. It also has more iron, higher levels of vitamins, and twice as much beta-carotene.”
“Well, all right then,” Jodelle said with a chuckle.
Baker stared at her for a moment, fighting the sudden urge to go to her, pick her up, and carry her into his bedroom. Had he ever felt this way about a woman?
No, definitely not.
“Can I help?” she asked.
Baker didn’t need help. He could make the spaghetti sauce in his sleep, but his kitchen wasn’t very big, and if Jodelle helped, they’d most certainly get in each other’s way…and he’d have a chance to brush up against her.
“You want to brown the meat for me?”
She immediately stood. “Of course.”
Forty-five minutes later, Baker carried two plates of pasta topped with sauce to the table. He’d made it less spicy than usual, since Jodelle said she wasn’t a huge fan of hot food. She stared down at the heaping plate of spaghetti and laughed.
“I can’t eat all this.”
“Then don’t,” Baker said with a shrug. “Whatever’s left over, I’ll eat later.”
When she continued to stare down at the plate and didn’t pick up her fork, Baker frowned. “What’s wrong? If you changed your mind, I can still grill us some steaks.”
Jodelle looked at him in surprise. “What? No. You went to all the trouble to make this, there’s no way I’d change my mind now.”
Baker leaned forward on his elbows from across the table. He wished he’d picked the seat next to her rather than opposite. Though, it wasn’t that big of a table, and he could reach out and take her hand in his even from where he was sitting, but he forced himself to stay still. “Anything you want, Jodelle. I never want you to do anything with me just to be polite. You change your mind, about anything, at any time, I’m more than happy to accommodate you.”
She stared at him for a moment, confusion and apprehension swirling in her brown eyes. “I don’t understand.”
Baker knew they needed to talk, but first, he really did want to feed her. She hadn’t eaten all day, had been too worried about taking care of “her” kids. He regretted worrying her. He sat back and took a deep breath. “Food first, then we’ll talk.”
His words didn’t seem to relax her, which just made him regret coming on too strong all the more. Baker had never been a subtle man. When he wanted something, he got it. Period. But this situation wasn’t like wanting to be a SEAL. Or wanting to track down a terrorist. Or wanting the newest gadget. He was dealing with Jodelle, and he needed to back the fuck off or he’d scare her away, which was the absolute last thing he wanted.
“Go on,” he said, attempting to lighten his tone. “Try it. Tell me what you think of the buffalo.”
He watched her take a deep breath, straighten her shoulders, and nod. She picked up her fork and wound some noodles around the tines, making sure to scoop up a healthy portion of sauce in the process. He waited with bated breath as she forked the bite into her mouth and chewed.
After she swallowed, she gave him a small smile and said, “It’s really good.”
“Of course it is,” Baker said with a touch of pride. He might not be a chef like Elodie Webber, but he could make a mean spaghetti sauce if he did say so himself.
Jodelle chuckled, then shook her head as she stared down at her plate. “Spaghetti. Is there anything less dignified to try to eat in front of someone you—” Her words stopped abruptly.
Baker hoped like hell she was about to say “someone you like.” But he didn’t want to embarrass her, so he did his best to deflect the conversation away from what she’d almost said.
“I’ll never forget when I was in Morocco and my team and I had been invited to a local tribe leader’s home. He was as proud as he could be to serve us some local delicacies. He brought out a plate of food, and we couldn’t recognize anything. But it would be rude, and quite the insult, to refuse to partake. I picked what I thought was the most inoffensive-looking item on the plate. Our host had this huge smile on his face, which I should’ve realized meant I should definitely not eat whatever it was I’d chosen. But as team leader, I had to suck it up. Our host picked up another one of the round balls and popped the whole thing in his mouth, then nodded at the object in my hand, as if to tell me to get on with it. So I mentally shrugged and copied him.”
Jodelle was smiling and leaning toward him as if enthralled with the story. “And? What was it?”
Baker realized for the first time that during a meal probably wasn’t the best time for this story. “Uh…maybe we should finish eating first.”
“Oh no, you started this story, you can’t leave me hanging. It’s not gonna turn me off this amazing pasta, Baker. Continue.”
“Right. Well, the thing was slightly squishy, so I could compress it with my teeth…but then it expanded again. The only thing I could do was bite into the soft sack. As soon as I did, a rush of slimy liquid filled my mouth, and it was all I could do not to spit it out right there. But as our host was nodding and smiling like I’d just given him the world, I forced myself to swallow. At least the thing in my mouth wasn’t quite as big as it was before, but what remained was rubbery, almost impossible to chew. No matter how much I chomped on whatever it was, it wasn’t getting any softer and it was still too fuckin’ big to just choke down.